i guess its sort of been a while, longer than usual anyway.

kind of stressed about family shit, dont really want to get into details. long story short; dads a dick and doesnt know how to "control" (yess, we will use that word) things and mom says if he gets into that mess again than she will leave. cant say as though i didnt expect that someday, they never really have seemed like the "happy couple" that you see around. i didnt actually think that would happen, but then i told her not to say stuff like that infront of scott if she wasnt serious, and she said she was serious...so? im happy for her if she feels like thats what she needs, and i would go with her in a second (for a while, as in not stay here) but that would most likely mean that my "dreams" are put on hold, i wouldnt be able to get out of here for a while. thats life though, i guess.

been getting some responses on the aupair thing, makes me excited...ive written them back, but nothing yet. the thing is, ive been doing some researching on getting a visa to go out of canada, and Ireland has a rule that if you are not a citazen than you need to be going to school, and are only able to work 35hours a week. so, since Ireland is really what I want, ive been searching schools there and maybe it might bring me to just going to school there, not being an aupair (which is completely fine), it just means that it would be wayyy more expensive. which i can definatley handle if i can get loans. debt...here we come!