I am in love with him.

Its taken about two and a half years for me to admit that to myself; but i finally have. I've always told myself that if he asked, I wouldn't be with him- I can't say the same thing anymore.

I want to tell him, I want to be with him, its all I think about. I just don't know if I can get up the nerve to do so, because I also don't want to be the reason that he leaves her- I want him to because he wants too, because he is unhappy (which I know he is).

So much for staying away from love, I've done well with that my entire life. I've seen to much hurt to want to be in love, I thought i'd be okay on my own- I didn't want to be hurt the way i've seen so many people. Seems as though thats my only option; I'm going to get hurt in this, I know I will. Now I just have to decide when I want the hurt to really start.

 I used to be the good girl, the one who judged girls like myself.