its been a while, i think longer than i've ever went without writing.

&i don't really even think there is much to report; i don't want to jinx things.

men are confusing, he tells me that he's interested- I've given him an out and he didn't take it, but he doesn't act interested. I rarely hear from him, which we're busy, working different schedules and hi overworking to save to buy a house.

with him or without him, I've made some decisions in my life- i want kids, i want to have them. I never thought this was something that i would want and i don't know what changed but it has. its crazy how things change as you get older.