i love you mom.

well, things are still looking down for the dad figure in the household.
you still drink to much, and im scared. i want to talk too him, but i feel like you will take it the wrong way or worse, deny it. i guess i just need to try and find the right time- but really, when will that be?

my brother is going through that fase in his life where he is an asshole! a really big one!!!
he really doesnt realize what it is that he doing, but its horrible the way that he is treating my mom, and i really just wish i could get it through his head that he cant talk to people like that.

me and mom had a huge heart to heart lastnight, with crying and all of the above.
she told me that she is afraid for me to leave, and that she doesnt want me too at all. i told her if she wanted, i wouldnt go...but then she responds with ' i cant ask you to do that for me'. im not sure what to do, i dont want to hurt her, i know that she just has huge troubles with letting go...but i really want this for myself. so i dont really know if i am able to say no.